Faith Over Circumstances

Mom and Dad had these sayings that didn’t make sense at the time, but I couldn’t help but remember them because they had a habit of repeating themselves. My first big paycheck came in 1998, well after I entered the workforce. For years I struggled to make ends meet as a teacher, as a trainer for the State, and working for the University. Then I finally made my way to private business. I was super excited about the upgrade in office furniture and the paycheck. Mom and Dad were both proud. And I remember Dad saying, “The more you make, the more you spend.” 

What? I can’t spend all of this money! This new job offer was almost double what I had been making. 

I have more than most people. I have a good job with great pay and benefits. From 2006 to 2016, I was single and was able to take care of my family on a single income because of my job. So, although tough at times, especially during my divorce, we were fine. We lived in a nice home with great neighbors. There was food in the pantry.  And a few years after the divorce was final, I was able to contribute to my 401K. I know, I have more than most. 

When Todd and I got married in August of 2016, we couldn’t imagine what we were going to do with our “extra” money. He and I both had been single for so long and at times were jealous of our friends with dual incomes. We can’t spend all this money! 

Todd hasn’t been to work in eight weeks. My fear when I was raising Jackson as a single parent was that I wouldn’t stay healthy enough to work. I would pray constantly like God didn’t know that was my fear. Praying the same prayer over and over out of fear is a clear sign that you think you’re doing it alone. Now as a dual income family, I face my fear. Todd has filed short term disability. Todd had a policy. I know, we have more than most. 

Todd will soon undergo spinal fusion surgery and a full laminectomy. Thoughts that consume my mind are will he ever stand up straight again. Will he be able to walk more than 10 steps and not have to kneel down in pain? Will he go back to work? 

In the middle of wrestling with this fear, Tropical Storm Imelda hit southeast Texas hard. Several folks I care about flooded again. Some of those folks had not been in their home long after recovering from Harvey. Why does this keep happening? I wanted to give. I had to give. But for the first time in a long time, I hesitated because I din’t know our own fate. Would Todd go back to work? Jackson needed a second retainer. Claire’s Beta trip money is due. I selfishly wanted to take my annual girl’s trip. And Todd’s medical bills are overwhelming. 

We gave anyway. Out of Faith. We gave knowing that we still had not met our deductible for Todd’s surgery. We gave to a non-profit doing God’s work on the ground in the hardest hit areas. We gave to a successful rebuild agency that was still helping community members after Harvey. And we gave to a personal friend that lost her car in the flood. We just gave. Even when we were scared. Even when the doctor bills kept getting bigger. Even not knowing if Todd would return to work. We gave. 

And then the craziest thing happened. We received a check in the mail Monday night from the IRS. It was for several thousand dollars. We overpaid our taxes from 2016, the year we got married. What, say what? How? The same CPA has been doing my taxes for 15 years. She never makes that kind of mistake! A refund from 2016 comes now? 

Now. When we have not met the deductible for Todd’s surgery and it’s six figures. Now, because we were obedient in other’s time of need. Now, when we chose to trust Him instead of our circumstances. I kept hearing a whisper, “It’s His anyway.”

We have more than most. Dad is right, you spend what you make. But mom had a saying too …. “You can’t out give God no matter how hard you try.”

There is always room to Give. Step out in faith. Trust Him and Give.

Malachi 3:10 Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!”